Tool #7: Lights! Camera! Action!
Good writers show the
action of the story.
Non-example: Patrick acted mad.
Example: Patrick kicked the chair
and stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
Non-example: Molly feels sad.
Example: Molly’s face crumpled
and a tear slid down her cheek.
Non-example: The teacher is
irritable.
Example: My teacher, Shauna, was
so mad she roared at the class, “Go put your heads down!”
Non-example: The class was in an
uproar
Non-example: King snakes suffocate
their prey.
Non-example: Speedy is keen to
escape.
